Look at becoming a teenager like lvling up in DND and hitting lvl 3. You have to pick a subclass, for teenagers that subclass immediately becomes Know-It-All or Know-Better-Than -Your-Parents. That first milligram of hormonal changes and they transform into a petulant, arrogant version of their former selves that quickly forms the opinion that their parents are inferior and they, the teenager, must do everything they can to break the former bond they formed. Unfortunately you can’t de-level them so it’s up to you to make it work because
As hard as teenagers can make things, never reply in anger, something said can not be taken back and can affect your relationship for the rest of your lives. My mother told me when I was fifteen that she “thinks she loved me but she has never liked me.” That hurt me so badly and I rebelled harder. When my son hit his teen years and said something, I wanted to hit back with an equally ugly “truth”, but I held my tongue and instead after all calmed down, we sat down and talked it out. To this day, I am so grateful I never replied to him the way my mother used to attack me. The joke that God made children cute so we didn’t kill them as teens, does hold true. Remember that somewhere in that hormonal tornado of a girl, your little girl is waiting to come back to you, and the way you react will make an impact. All I can say is hang in there, this to shall pass.
My daughter and I were best of friends until she hit like 12–13 years old. Then everything changed. She was unapproachable and blamed me for everything yadah…, Today she is 25 years old and we are once again best friends. It is rare that a parent doesn’t go through this period with a teenager. I have 5 kids and yes have been through it 5 times lol. They were all different for different reasons, but the root cause was the same. They are just trying to figure it all out. Just hang in there and be consistent in what you know to be in her best interest.